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	<title>The Nervous Breakdown &#187; Reno J. Romero</title>
	<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com</link>
	<description>It's going to be okay.</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Mon, 05 Jul 2010 18:30:16 +0000</lastBuildDate>
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		<title>What&#8217;s Wrong with California?</title>
		<description><![CDATA[WOODLAND, NORTHERN CA -
I moved back to California around two months ago. What brought me back home after fifteen years? Well, a few things. Personal things. Some things not so personal. In the end, I was feeling a bit tapped out in Vegas. The bones weren&#8217;t tumbling like they used to and I was almost at the point [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/10/whats-wrong-with-california/</link>
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		<title>One-Fourth Into It, Buttercup, But Lucky You There&#8217;s Three-Fourths Left: Notes From Footballdamus</title>
		<description><![CDATA[WOODLAND, NORTHERN CA -
Four weeks of the NFL season have come and gone. Seems like yesterday some of our favorite professional (and not so favorite) jocks, suited up, started spitting and slapping asses, and took the field to kill each other. I, like many of you, have been there every Sunday bug-eyed and partially insane. It&#8217;s [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/10/one-fourth-into-it-buttercup-but-lucky-you-theres-three-fourths-left-notes-from-footballdamus/</link>
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		<title>Bring the NFL Pain: Gridiron Pesole Revisited</title>
		<description><![CDATA[SAC, NORTHERN CA -
NFL.
It&#8217;s back. 
I feel whole and brand new. Like that Stylistics tune. As many of you know, it was a long and brutal wait. I jonesed and bitched. But it&#8217;s here again. On time. Just like Christmas. 
I was 13 for 16 in Week 1. That&#8217;s right. They were simple picks. The teams you figured to win did just [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/09/bring-the-nfl-pain-gridiron-pesole-revisited/</link>
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		<title>One Guitar, Thomas Pynchon, and Spinning Wheels: Moving Back to California</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
Moving.
Here I go again.
(Wait! Isn&#8217;t that a damn Whitesnake song?)
Anyhow, here I go again.
Here&#8217;s a quick map of where I&#8217;ve been. Born in L.A. Moved to Victorville. Moved to Vegas. Then I moved to Charlotte, NC, where I spent three miserable years. Then back to Vegas. And now: Sacramento, back to California [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/08/one-guitar-thomas-pynchon-and-spinning-wheels-moving-back-to-california/</link>
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		<title>I Speed at Night</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
I&#8217;m a night person. I pull all-nighters. No, I don&#8217;t do speed (although I might as well). I simply hit an hour of no return and there I am watching the clock roll into the future. Bringing in the next day. Telling me I made one more.
2am.
4:30am.
Usually, if I get to bed before [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/08/i-speed-at-night/</link>
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		<title>Carmen: My Mom</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
I moved back to Vegas from Charlotte over a year ago. The reasons? Too many. But one of them was that my mom (my grandmother actually) was battling cancer and I wanted to be by her side. I spent many sad nights on the east coast thinking about what she was going [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/07/carmen-my-mom/</link>
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		<title>A Thousand Words: Lost in Hollywood</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV-
I called Brad Listi from some sleepy little suburb in Sacramento. We chatted. I think I strong-armed the poor fellow and told him that I wanted to read at TNB&#8217;s first L.A reading. He&#8217;s too kind. Dear and charming.
I got the gig.
So, L.A.  I had to go. Haven&#8217;t seen my birth city in [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/07/1000-words-lost-in-hollywood-or-rich-ferguson-rush-does-suck-and-i-dont-want-to-hear-it-mutha-oh-and-youre-a-badass-and-i-want-to-lick-your-nipples/</link>
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		<title>Ball In: Basketball Dreams in the Heart of Memory and William Kittredge</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS -
So, the plane touched down. I sat in between some dude that had a little too much of Vegas and some chick with large pretty brown eyes.
He smelled like he was broke.
She smelled good.
I like girls that smell good.
She kept looking over my shoulder trying to read the book I was chewing into.
&#8220;Whatcha reading?&#8221; [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/07/ball-in-basketball-dreams-in-the-heart-of-memory-and-william-kittredge/</link>
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		<title>Pushing: Seeking the Runner&#8217;s Mind in the Shadow of Wayne Newton and Frankenstein</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS - NV
I jog around five days a week. 
I have two routes. 
One route is my neighborhood and it consists of a giant square through a few neighborhoods that are infested with chihuahuas, faded houses, and small apartments. 
The other is Sunset Park. A large park loaded with baseball fields, volleyball and basketball courts, etc, and [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/06/pushing-seeking-the-runners-mind-in-the-shadow-of-wayne-newton-and-frankenstein/</link>
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		<title>The Mormon in Me and Other Hot-Ass Stories From the Vegas Front #2</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV - 

Dude, I&#8217;ve Seen Your Balls
I called an old high school buddy to give him my new phone number. It was a business call. In and out. I wasn’t in the talking mood.  
His wife answered the phone. Tammy’s a good woman. Thoughtful. Funny. Pretty good pool player. I met her for the first time last year [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/06/the-mormon-in-me-and-other-hot-ass-stories-from-the-vegas-front-2/</link>
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		<title>Job Misery and the Man They Called the Disappearing A-Hole</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
I’ve been working for what seems and feels like a thousand years. My first job was picking up my dogs’ (a black labrador retriever, a pit bull, and a chihuahua) crap. I was in 7th grade and my father gave me five bucks a week for my services.
There I’d be, with a shovel [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/05/job-misery-and-the-man-they-called-the-disappearing-a-hole/</link>
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		<title>Distortion and the Picaresque Lion: A Cat Story</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV - 
Because of a weird set of circumstances, I’ve acquired a cat. Or he’s acquired me. Either way, I’m the one who looks after him. I’m the one who gives him crunchies. I pour the water. I take care of his shitter. 
His name is Chaz. He’s an orange tabby. Beautiful, cub-like face. [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/05/distortion-and-the-picaresque-lion-a-cat-story/</link>
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		<title>Of Clamato and Karaoke</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
The night before I left for Sacramento, I was up until 5am partying with my aunt and my cousin who hails from the soft beaches of Orange County. Both of them are dear creatures. It wasn’t meant to be a party. In fact, there wasn’t a party in sight. They were having a [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/04/of-clamato-and-karaoke/</link>
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		<title>God Bless the Song Dedication, George Michael, B. Francis, and Putting Books on Hold at the Wrong Store</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
I was on my way to the bookstore. I called earlier and had them hold a book for me. Cool thing about where I live is that everything I need is five minutes away. Giant mall. Restaurants. Novelty stores. Markets. Toys R Us and Roberto’s Taco Shop. 
I stepped into the bookstore and [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/03/god-bless-the-song-dedication-george-michael-b-francis-and-putting-books-on-hold-at-the-wrong-store/</link>
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		<title>The Terminator, Birthdays, and Special Monkey Cake</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
I was going through some boxes the other day and came across some pictures my father gave me a few years ago. Old pictures. Me as a kid. Me in Yosemite. Me dressed as a pirate for Halloween. Me and my friend Eddie (my folks called him “Cholo Ed”) standing in front [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/02/the-terminator-birthdays-and-special-monkey-cake/</link>
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		<title>Planes, Trains, Porn, and a Man Named Obama: A Year Already</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV - 
Well, folks, we&#8217;re almost a month into 2009 and things are already crazy. Things have happened. A failed president ends his reign of incompetence. A new guy lives in the White House. The Cardinals are going to the Super Bowl. A man in the Philippines took some video of a ghost on his phone. 
And that&#8217;s just in the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/01/planes-trains-porn-and-a-man-named-obama-a-year-already/</link>
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		<title>Redheads and Steroids: D-List Chingasos in the Land of Amish Ovens and Jack Lambert</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV - 
Boxing is a manly sport.
It&#8217;s not the meek tea party scene of golf. 
Theogenes – a Greek badass - won over 1300 fights and never lost a battle in over twenty years. He pummeled his competition. He smashed in their heads. He broke their will. He made them his bitch. He didn&#8217;t [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/01/redheads-and-steroids-d-list-chingasos-in-the-land-of-amish-ovens-and-jack-lambert/</link>
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		<title>Out of the Pan: Restaurant Stories #1</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS - NV
My first restaurant job was as a cook. A little dive off of Sahara. I&#8217;d never cooked before, but the manager hired me anyhow.
&#8220;You gotta fuckin&#8217; learn some time. Know what I’m saying?&#8221;
Juan was somewhere in his thirties. Half white, half Mexican dude. Had green eyes and thick black hair that hugged [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/01/out-of-the-pan-restaurant-stories-1/</link>
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		<title>Gridiron Posole: Random Notes from the Badlands of Green Valley</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS - NV
Wildcard weekend is over. Eight teams went into the weekend with Super Bowl dreams and four teams came out of it still having Super Bowl dreams. The other four teams are cleaning out their lockers, packing up their stuff.
Later. Goodbye. Adios.
So, let&#8217;s give a hearty bratwurst and beer-gut congratulations to the Ravens, Eagles, [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/01/gridiron-posole-random-notes-from-the-badlands-of-green-valley/</link>
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		<title>Poor Boys, Panthers, and Steelers and We&#8217;re All Going to Graceland: The NFL Playoffs</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS - NV
Well, folks, the NFL regular season is over and the playoff picture is here. It&#8217;s alive. First, let me say that it was one hell of a season. It was a party, a 17-week riot. Tons of drama and man blood.
Heads were ripped off shoulders. Rude things were said. The Hail Mary was chanted. Bones were snapped. Some teams that the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2009/01/poor-boys-panthers-and-steelers-and-were-all-going-to-graceland-the-nfl-playoffs/</link>
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		<title>Janus&#8217; Curse: Cigarettes and Doubt in the New Year&#8217;s Resolution</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV-
2009.
It&#8217;s around this time of the year that we reflect on the year that was. We look back at the months, the days - mind pushed in reverse, remembering things, conversations, people.
We do this. Every year like clockwork. Looking over our shoulder then looking straight. One foot inside the door, one foot out. It&#8217;s part of the deal.
Adam Duritz of the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2008/12/janus-curse-cigarettes-and-doubt-in-the-new-years-resolution/</link>
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		<title>Dropping the Polish Hammer: Two Weird Nights at the Bunny Ranch</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
I&#8217;ve never paid for a hooker.
Never thought of it, really. But I&#8217;ve known a few people that have. I even worked with a waitress that once worked at a brothel. I think it was in Sparks.
&#8220;Every man should have a hooker at least once,&#8221; she told me.
Maybe she was right. Maybe a man should have a [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2008/12/dropping-the-polish-hammer-two-weird-nights-at-the-bunny-ranch/</link>
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		<title>The Turkey&#8217;s Gone, But There&#8217;s Still Pig in the Fridge</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
The NFL season is winding down. Which is a little sad. Not entirely sad because there&#8217;s still a lot of football to be played. But still. Week 13 is a goner. All bets are settled.
The payoffs are in the distance.
For some teams.
The beginning of the season is always full of talk. All the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2008/12/the-turkeys-gone-but-theres-still-pig-in-the-fridge/</link>
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		<title>Digital Bitch: A Remote Control Odyssey</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV - 
 
&#8220;Sing that shit, girl.&#8221;
- Rasputia, Norbit

 
After the cable man (I think his name was Sergio or David) was done hooking up my TV he went through the million buttons on the remote control.
&#8220;Check it out, bro,&#8221; he said, displaying the remote control in front of me. &#8220;It&#8217;s real simple.&#8221;
Bro.
Dude.
Man.
People always call me one [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2008/11/digital-bitch-a-remote-control-odyssey/</link>
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		<title>The Art of Moving; or If Jonathan Ogden Had One Arm and Was Hammered On Whiskey, I Could Kick His Ass</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
Always Mystified
I&#8217;ve never counted the times I&#8217;ve moved. But it&#8217;s been a lot. In my years living in Vegas I think I&#8217;ve moved four or five times.
I moved from L.A to Victorville when I was a kid. While in L.A I moved a handful of times. In Victorville I moved a few [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2008/11/the-art-of-moving-or-if-jonathan-ogden-had-one-arm-and-was-hammered-on-whiskey-i-could-kick-his-ass/</link>
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		<title>Goodbye, Mr. Lopez</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
I was a kid when my Uncle Jim died. He was young. Too young, in fact. I think he was thirty-three years old. The man drank himself to death.
He was the one who started calling me Reno (the rest of my family called me Rene). I loved Jim. And when he died, it was shocking to me. I couldn&#8217;t believe he [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2008/11/goodbye-mr-lopez/</link>
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		<title>Thirty-Four Plates of Ham and Eggs</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
Over a hearty Mexican dinner, I decided to wake up early and throw in some NFL picks. I don&#8217;t normally gamble. This was probably my fourth parley card I&#8217;ve ever played. But I figured, what the hell. After all, it was the first Sunday of the NFL 2008-2009 season.
Fall. Football.
Life was pleasant [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2008/10/thirty-four-plates-of-ham-and-eggs/</link>
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		<title>Cheesy Arpeggios, a Bastard Named James, and a God-Awful Thought of Bret Michaels Re-Recording Every Rose Has Its Thorn</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS -
I was in the 9th grade when I first heard Yngwie Malmsteen play guitar. A friend had Alcatrazz&#8217;s album No Parole From Rock &#8216;n&#8217; Roll - a mother of an album. We both just started playing guitar. Greenhorns. Rookies.
We sucked.
&#8220;Dude, listen to this. This is that fuckin&#8217; Yngwie guy I was telling you about.&#8221;
The needle hit the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2008/10/cheesy-arpeggios-a-bastard-named-james-and-a-god-awful-thought-of-bret-michaels-re-recording-every-rose-has-its-thorn/</link>
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		<title>Today&#8217;s Special: Basket of Wings with a Side of Bleu Cheese or Brueghel</title>
		<description><![CDATA[LAS VEGAS, NV -
Aeroplane
The story of Daedalus and Icarus is essentially a story of a son not listening to the advice of his father. Father says don&#8217;t do it, son does it. In this case, Daedalus, the father, tells his son (who&#8217;s outfitted with wings his father made) not to fly too close to the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2008/09/todays-special-basket-of-wings-with-a-side-of-bleu-cheese-or-brueghel/</link>
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		<title>Charles Marino and Other Hot-Ass Stories From the Vegas Front</title>
		<description><![CDATA[
LAS VEGAS, NV-
The Girls of Bromidrosis
The first night I arrived in Vegas I ate fried-chicken and drank beer. Under normal circumstances this is not a good combination. Hell, it doesn&#8217;t even sound good. Fried-chicken and beer. But these weren&#8217;t normal circumstances. I had just arrived home after living over three years in the South where [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://archives.thenervousbreakdown.com/rjromero/2008/08/charles-marino-and-other-hot-ass-stories-from-the-vegas-front/</link>
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