Saturday, April 29, 2017
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Seriously are you kidding me?

Kit Seningen Archive

Kit Seningen

Case Studies in Stupidity Vol. I

April 1st, 2009
by Kit Seningen

CHESTERTOWN, MD-

Not writing when you should is stupid.

Really. Really. Really.

I’ve found myself doing to writing what I normally do to my workouts.

Brain:  Maybe you should write.

Me:  Maybe you should shut the hell up.

Brain:  Hey don’t take that tone with me mister!

Me:  Here, huff this glue. A-hole.

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Kit Seningen

Slipping into Shadow

September 24th, 2008
by Kit Seningen

CHESTERTOWN, MD-

The sun is shining.

Clear and deeply blue skies are filled with canada geese on their annual pilgrimage to Maryland’s Eastern Shore.

Blue crabs are at the azimuth of their season.  Beautiful and full.

Jeans, t-shirts, and flip flops are the fashion of this glorious season.

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Kit Seningen

Rewind-Fast Forward-Play

August 25th, 2008
by Kit Seningen

Chestertown, MD-

8-25-2008 2:38 p.m.

The dream that I had last night is staying fresh.  Most don’t.

I’m here to measure the floor in Mr. Hash’s house.  He wants Karndean. Karndean is faux flooring, it displays many of the natural looks of slate, or ash, or walnut, or anthracite, but it’s not.  Karndean is an LVT or luxury vinyl tile.  The representative for the company who distributes Karndean said to me once, “It’s green because no trees are killed to produce the product.”

Uh, what?

So I called his bullshit.

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Kit Seningen

Thanks for Ruining Everything, Porn

August 20th, 2008
by Kit Seningen

CHESTERTOWN, MD-

As she leans forward, soft and tanned flesh appears between the off white buttons of her shirt. A long lock of dark hair nestles on her outstretched arm. The ice gently tinkles against the side of the glass as she fills it, unaware that her curved flesh is making the human heart race.

The amydgala is activated.

FMRI’s (functional magnetic resonance imaging) produce evidence that blood flow is increased by heightened levels of neural firing.

The thalamus works in conjunction with the amydgala to regulate and focus attention.

An involuntary thickening of the throat prompts an immediate grab for the freshly poured water.

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Kit Seningen

Remarques Cinglantes or the Interloper

August 14th, 2008
by Kit Seningen

CHESTERTOWN, MD-

“Hold it together man!”

Shut up you. I’m getting there, so cut me some slack.

“Persevere!”

Look, don’t make me stick this pencil up my nose and take care of you Randle Patrick McMurphy style.

“Against all odds you shall prevail!”

This is my brain. My brain speaks to me, ad nauseum, typically in a British accent. It’s also a veritable movie quote machine. In fact, I figure that when my brain shuts up I’ll finally be hanging with Chief Bromden and we can talk about how hard it was to power lift that sink off the floor. At this very moment my brain is in full on battle- Braveheart-you’ll-take-my-life-but-never-take- my-freedom frenzy.

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