Diagonal Lines Are Your Friends
April 6th, 2009by Aaron Dietz
SEATTLE, WA-
It’s 6:02pm. I’m leaving work. At the building where I work, I have two options:
1. Take the shortest path by walking through part of the driveway.
2. Walk a longer path by sticking to the sidewalk.
I take the short path. And I can’t help wondering about the people who take the longer path.
It’s as if they feel obligated to obey the whims of a landscape architect they’ve never met.
Perhaps a graphic will help explain the situation:
As you can see, if you’re going work at this building for more than a year or so, you could probably save a good ten minutes of your life just by taking the diagonal line (Path 2).
Plus, you don’t look like a conformist, like those that take Path 1.
I talked to a co-worker about it once, after she confessed that she felt weird using part of the circular driveway. She said that whenever she did, a car would drive through and have to wait for her to get out of the way.
This is a valid point, since it’s no fun to be considered rude by people who can run you over.
However, morality suggests that cars should bow to pedestrians, as they’re not the ones polluting the environment. Pedestrians, since they’re essentially saving the planet just by walking, should have the moral right of way.
And if you’re like me, you tend to just take the diagonal line unless there’s a car coming. Then you get out of the way, because moral ground doesn’t usually support you after you’re dead.
Of course, in many situations, people do see the diagonal line. And still others are horrified by it.
During my first year in college, I noticed that the students saw the diagonal line clearly, and the administrators sought to eliminate the diagonal line in a futile attempt at defending the integrity of the landscape architecture.
The following is a rough sketch of the main campus grounds.
The sidewalks were there to help people get to the buildings. But of course, the students were smart enough to know that they’d be wasting a lot of time if they actually used the sidewalk to cross the campus.
So, they walked the diagonal lines, and the result was a series of muddy paths worn into the grass within weeks.
The administration’s answer? Put up cheap temporary fencing around all the grassy areas. The temporary fencing was up for the rest of the semester.
What would I have done? Probably, I’d have paved the paths that were actually used, since that would look a whole lot better than a bunch of cheap, unrolled temporary fencing.
Even if you don’t pave new paths, a few diagonal dirt paths look a lot better than the fencing they felt forced to put up.
Of course, I’m no landscape architect. I just want to get where I’m going without feeling herded along an inconvenient path.
And maybe I just feel like I know where I want to go better than anyone else.
Tags: campus, diagonal lines, landscape architecture, morality, students, work
Do you know the old Sesame Street sketch, an animated bit where two lines are traveling on a collision course? One line is going across the screen from left to right, the other on a parralel course that will cause the two lines to crash into each other.
Each line is making its own little noise–one line sounds like “zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz’ and the other sounds like “zhzhzhzhzhzhzhzhzh”. So, you kinda hear a zzz zhzhzhzhzhzh zzzz zhzhzhzh…one of those things kids love to imitate and which I am sure my brother and I adopted (only moving forward when “activated” by our signature noise) till our mom told us to can it.
They meet in the middle of the screen and start to argue–get out of my way, no you get out of mine, etc. Obviously, they have reached in impasse. Then, the lines decide to cooperate. I can’t really remember how they work things out, but suspect the lesson they’re demonstrating is something like “take turns” or “share and be nice” or “cooperate”.
Diagonal paths are a bit like that.
I’m sadly not familiar with that sketch, but somehow I think after your description it would pale in comparison to how you’ve described it. Thanks for the story!
I too, seem to move to a unique sound, and am sometimes told to can it.
Here it is:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4wSamtzviQQ&feature=PlayList&p=9C8012609C3676EF&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=73
PS: Irene! I just watched this on Youtube, and my kitten practically had a heart attack.
Thanks for tracking that down, Amanda! It’s odd that I can now catch up on my lack of childhood TV-watching.
My pleasure! I get paid to sit at a computer all day, piecing together other people’s family histories.
I must confess this often meanders into tracking down the detritus of my own past, in the form of Sesame Street bits, Muppet Show special guest stars, and instructions for coifing my hair into 1980s styles I wish I could deny I once sported.
: )
Aaron,
I always take the diagonal except when it’s J walking and there is a policeman around. You are totally right here.
Amanda,
That precise sketch from Sesame Street was one of the only things on the show that freaked out my son Tim, which, of course, freaked out my daughter Lenore. (Lenore was just a follower in this. She just assumed if her incredible perfect big brother was scared she should be too.) They used to run from the room covering their ears and making loud noises so they couldn’t hear it.
The other sketch was the zoom-zoom, zoom-zoom, zoom-zoom (something one syllable) one. I forget what that was for.
It’s almost impossible to understand the fears of children.
I also loved the type writer who went “noo noo noo noo noo” before typing a letter into his own head.
I think our generation was largely molded by that programme.
Refusing to use an inconvenient sidewalk is a sign of independent thinking. Not that using one is a sign of not being independent in other ways, but still…I’m proud of the little tiny independent things I do.
Is it me, or in that first graphic, does it look like your pot-bellied sidewalk is crapping out a big green turd?
I’m just saying.
Yeah, I just grabbed an image of a pot-bellied something crapping a green poo and relabeled it. Very astute, Kimberly!
When I started reading this, my first thought was about the administrations reaction to the student-worn paths on our campus. At first they tried that cheap fencing and signs that politely asked people not to walk on the grass. Within one semester they had just decided to pave over those paths. It’s pretty funny to walk on campus now because each semester there are new paved paths added to campus, crisscrossing every which way. I’m sure the landscape architects are disgusted by it, but it’s SO convenient and keeps me from getting muddy during the winter
Exactly! If I were a disgruntled landscape architect, I’d probably just do the whole area as grass at first, see where the paths are, then pave those paths. Why do they want to bend us to their inconveniently traveling will?
I mean, it’s fine at a park or somewhere where you’re supposed to take your time and enjoy things, but in a practical situation like when you’re trying to get to class after procrastinating, it makes sense to go with the flow.
P.S. I walked on the grass today on campus and thought of this post. Teehee.
Nice. Keep that going.
I love anything that contains rough graphics that help explain the situation. God, I’d kill to see a Venn Diagram on TNB.
Actually.
That gives me an idea…
If you don’t put a Venn Diagram up soon, I’m totally stealing that idea.
Thanks for stopping by, Simon!
Aaron,
We were in Seattle years ago. When we were there the people were serious about rules. There could be not a single car or truck or bus in sight, and yet everyone waited for the light to change to cross the street. Since Victor and I grew up in Brooklyn, we, of course, crossed when it was safe regardless of the light. The crowds of people following the rules murmured behind us, but waited patiently for the green light. This happened over and over. What’s up with that?
Also, all the bus kiosks were all occupied by street people. Anyone waiting for a bus who was a regular person had to wait near the kiosk. I never saw so many randomly gesturing, talking to no one, people in my life. Did they close all the looney bins in Seattle awhile ago?
There are still crowds that follow the light signals, though crossing the street without electronic guidance is probably more acceptable these days, perhaps because even more transplants have arrived in the last few years (I’ve only been here for a few).
But now you can’t tell who the loonies are, because everyone has hands-free headsets on, so EVERYONE is talking to themselves.
I haven’t even read. Your graphic looks like a dude pissing on his ankle. HHahahaahahaaha!
Someone pointed out the green poo in the middle, yet I still didn’t even catch the pee.
And now that I’ve read… Angles are our friends. They keep us from following herded animals.
And even knowing this, I catch myself waiting with other pedestrians at a stop light when no cars are in sight….
This is your answer for not becoming a landscape architect, isn’t it?
It was either that or writing. Writing looked much easier.
I cant recall the name but some forward thinking college - Reed maybe - made no sidewalks til after the first year and then they just paved the paths the students were already walking.
Glad to know there’s someone out there that’s way smarter than me, doing the things I think of way before I even think of. Thanks for mentioning that!
In military training it was “against the rules” for us to walk on the grass. Had to use sidewalks that seemed like they were purposely made too narrow and very inconvenient to getting anywhere. Of course, I walked on the grass. About twenty grown men ratted me out. It was a perfect introduction to military life.
Nice input! Yeah, the military arena definitely seems to be one where diagonal lines are discouraged.
I about died laughing with that first sumo-wrestler-taking-a-poo graphic of yours. Classy landscape design.
TOLD YA!!!!!!!
Okay okay, next time I’m just going to make a bunch of completely innocent illustrations, then pass them off as dirty pics.
I think you may have found your calling, Aaron. I wonder what you could do with a map of DC…
Don’t tempt me! I’m supposed to be working on a novel….
And a proper novel needs proper illustrations. At least…the kind I read do…